I would have never thought that this is where I'd be today. August had brought a new perspective into my life and it's given me another view upon everything. I'd been used and mistreated in my past, then finally able to find a man for who I could and most definitely now can call my own. I've been up and down so many roads and trying to understand why....I've fallen for him.
For something that began slightly on August 27th. Something to begin and go from being something that I never knew I wanted, from thinking I didn't want it at all...I've gained such a thing that I'd never trade for the world. This has became a true thing. A true and definite thing that I'm the happiest I could ever be to be able to look at someone and finally have found the one thing that could make me complete. I didn't ask for this and nor would I ever trade it for the world. Let me begin? Let me begin where this all could have ever changed...
August 27th, the day that I was just going to get with Jordan for one simple fact. I just wanted to have a Friend with Benefits. No strings attached. I had walked into the college and just stood in the hallway for a few minutes then when Jordan had saw me, he walked out and just stood in front of me. I had stood still for a few minutes and he'd expected a hug from me...I'd hesitate for a minute until finally I had asked him if he had a ride home. This is when things began. After class was over, Jordan and I had drove to the look-out point in town and just talked for a few hours. Things began to progress and I had just expected us to be like I said, friends with benefits. As it began to get later, I just hesitated and I didn't want us to be friends with benefits. I would look off into a day dream and I just didn't want him to be yet another man to add to my list. I stopped in my tracks and just gave up. He'd given me a million reasons not to fall for him, but I didn't want to give up so easily. I sat there waiting to find the right words to say next, but when I just didn't find a single word...I'd just given up on words. Jordan then had led to another point and I'd told him that I was always the person to make the first move...I wasn't about to do that same. He'd tried to pull me over, but obviously my arms are longer so that had ended up to be a fail. Once the fact had been forgotten, we'd kissed. His kiss was something different than any other.
Later that night, I'd driven him home and we'd sat upon the hood of my jeep at least until 11:30pm. We just lied there underneath the stars and it had felt like it we'd always done it. Always lying upon his chest and just saying whatever came to mind. It felt so right for us just to be there.
At this point....I hope you're reading this, yes you Jordan.
September 7th, yes I still remember. September 7th was the date the you came to school and had told me that you had plans to ask me out. Do you remember how when you'd looked at me and I can see how your eyes would just feel up with pain. I knew I wanted to be with you and the same for you, but it had held us back to be able to call you mine. For us to be able to lie upon my couch and just having you in my arms...not being able to call you mine officially. You had looked at me and had told me that you wanted to be with me. I wanted to be with you just as badly and it had hurt not being to able to say that I was yours.
October 3, 2012..Yes. The date that forever (hopefully) changed my status. My relationship status had changed from forever lonely (single) to in a relationship. My heart began to melt, it just faded within your grasp with each time I looked upon your smile. I fell for you even more than I had already done before. I had already fallen for you and for you be officially mine on this day...created such a feeling. I said "yes" when you asked me out to make it official. You're mine...officially. You're mine and I couldn't have asked for anything more, but you be mine and for me to be with you and only you.
