Names are not Real. Covering up the identities. My story is simple, short and sweet. Where to begin is the question though. I'm taking a big risk with my life at the moment. My story is like this. A little catch up; Allan has a girl, and a baby. Apparently, there aren't anything because Allan can't stand her. The only reason he is with her still is because of his baby. His baby, Keith is almost 2years old. Story begins; About two months ago I got involved with a great guy. I was working one night with my cousin, John and his friend Allan. I had been working and I was just messing around out in my truck after I had gotten off. Allan had been texting John and asked him "ask her if i can get a kiss before she leaves" I looked at John and just smiled. I told him to text Allan back and tell him that I wasn't leave just yet.
He also had texted him and said for him to come out and get one now. Allan walking outside and sat in my passenger seat and just sat there for a minute. I looked over at him and then he moved closer towards me, we kissed. Allan had to work closing that night so I stayed in the parking lot waiting for him to get off so we could hang out. John looked at me and told me that if me and him went inside to help Allan get his closing done, then we could get out sooner. So, I walked in and helped. As me and John stood next the sinks in the back...Allan walked by me when I asked John who was riding with who. Allan whispered to John "Get her to ride with me". I nodded when John told me and I smiled. As we finished cleaning, I could tell Allan was staring at me a lot. Afterwards, when everything was done and clean...I rode with Allan to the county park. He was showing off quite a bit and it just put a smile on my face. The night was great. Every guy had a girl, Every girl had a guy. It was me (Courtney), John, Allan, Amber, Sarah & Kyle. We were standing outside the vehicles and listening to the radio. I ended standing next to Allan's truck and he just kept his hands around me. It was just nice having him hold me in his arms. I knew, in a way...it was wrong for me to be with him. Knowing he had a girl already and a baby; but, it just felt right being with him. Like, nothing would go wrong now. We ended up together.
A few days later, I went into work. Thinking maybe it had just been a one time thing. I told John that I needed to talk to Allan. Allan's girl was there. I had to wait until she left, and then I talked to him. I told him that I wanted to be more than friends, I didn't want to be friends with benefits. I asked him "how much do you like me?" he looked at me and said "a lot". It felt great hearing him say that. A couple of days later, I would have Jane (my best friend) or John text Allan for me. They texted him "are you two together or wat?" and he would text back "maybe" I wasn't sure if that was a complete yes or no. I kept working at finding out what I wanted to know and hear.
So, a few times at work it was like I knew we were together; but, I wasn't for sure. At work, whenever someone would not be looking Allan would steal a kiss from me. When we got paid this past week, Allan took me home after we had cashed our checks. Me and him just spent time with each other down an abandoned road from my house. Spending time with just made me great having him right next to me. Not doing anything wrong; but, just spending time talking and kissing. Nothing more, Nothing less. Lately, It's began to change. Nothing is the same. It's like when I text him, he doesn't reply. It's like he is wanting to avoid me now. I can't look at him or ever see him without something going wrong now. It's like the time we spent together...just wasn't meant to last. It's like, now I'm feeling like I'm going to be the one hurt in the end. I don't think I can win this fight. I want to fight for him, because I'm beginning to create these feelings for him that I can't explain. I don't want to lose him like I've lost everything else. I want me and him to work out and I just want my feeling's for him to wind up being the greatest feelings in the world to me.
Thanks for reading.
He also had texted him and said for him to come out and get one now. Allan walking outside and sat in my passenger seat and just sat there for a minute. I looked over at him and then he moved closer towards me, we kissed. Allan had to work closing that night so I stayed in the parking lot waiting for him to get off so we could hang out. John looked at me and told me that if me and him went inside to help Allan get his closing done, then we could get out sooner. So, I walked in and helped. As me and John stood next the sinks in the back...Allan walked by me when I asked John who was riding with who. Allan whispered to John "Get her to ride with me". I nodded when John told me and I smiled. As we finished cleaning, I could tell Allan was staring at me a lot. Afterwards, when everything was done and clean...I rode with Allan to the county park. He was showing off quite a bit and it just put a smile on my face. The night was great. Every guy had a girl, Every girl had a guy. It was me (Courtney), John, Allan, Amber, Sarah & Kyle. We were standing outside the vehicles and listening to the radio. I ended standing next to Allan's truck and he just kept his hands around me. It was just nice having him hold me in his arms. I knew, in a way...it was wrong for me to be with him. Knowing he had a girl already and a baby; but, it just felt right being with him. Like, nothing would go wrong now. We ended up together.
A few days later, I went into work. Thinking maybe it had just been a one time thing. I told John that I needed to talk to Allan. Allan's girl was there. I had to wait until she left, and then I talked to him. I told him that I wanted to be more than friends, I didn't want to be friends with benefits. I asked him "how much do you like me?" he looked at me and said "a lot". It felt great hearing him say that. A couple of days later, I would have Jane (my best friend) or John text Allan for me. They texted him "are you two together or wat?" and he would text back "maybe" I wasn't sure if that was a complete yes or no. I kept working at finding out what I wanted to know and hear.
So, a few times at work it was like I knew we were together; but, I wasn't for sure. At work, whenever someone would not be looking Allan would steal a kiss from me. When we got paid this past week, Allan took me home after we had cashed our checks. Me and him just spent time with each other down an abandoned road from my house. Spending time with just made me great having him right next to me. Not doing anything wrong; but, just spending time talking and kissing. Nothing more, Nothing less. Lately, It's began to change. Nothing is the same. It's like when I text him, he doesn't reply. It's like he is wanting to avoid me now. I can't look at him or ever see him without something going wrong now. It's like the time we spent together...just wasn't meant to last. It's like, now I'm feeling like I'm going to be the one hurt in the end. I don't think I can win this fight. I want to fight for him, because I'm beginning to create these feelings for him that I can't explain. I don't want to lose him like I've lost everything else. I want me and him to work out and I just want my feeling's for him to wind up being the greatest feelings in the world to me.
Thanks for reading.
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